Here's a video of down's tards. They are talking about dreams. Most of their dreams include not flinging poo and smearing it on walls.
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Tard Plays Fetch
Here is one from LOLsaywhat.com. It is obviously fake.
i found the lack of tard stories on here disturbing, so here's what happened a few weeks ago when i was going home from work.
>just finished work, late in afternoon>have to cross a few streets to get to parking garage>stuck at crossing with large group of people>theres a mother and her young tard son>hes barking and thinks he's a dog>he's roofing at me and trys leg humping a stranger>she shouts at him and tries to control him>he calms abit, everyone is looking at him, hes now growling>get epic idea>get newspaper out of briefcase>throw into on coming traffic and shout FETCH!>tard barks and runs into traffic>mother screams >tards gets hit by car>car was slowing down to turn, so it wasnt going really fast>tard was knocked over, bleeding, crying and screaming>crowd gathers, light turns green, i cross street>go home and lulz to myself but feel a little bad about it
>saw tard again some time later>broken leg and scratched up face>glad he was ok... well, sort of ok anyway
i found the lack of tard stories on here disturbing, so here's what happened a few weeks ago when i was going home from work.
>just finished work, late in afternoon>have to cross a few streets to get to parking garage>stuck at crossing with large group of people>theres a mother and her young tard son>hes barking and thinks he's a dog>he's roofing at me and trys leg humping a stranger>she shouts at him and tries to control him>he calms abit, everyone is looking at him, hes now growling>get epic idea>get newspaper out of briefcase>throw into on coming traffic and shout FETCH!>tard barks and runs into traffic>mother screams >tards gets hit by car>car was slowing down to turn, so it wasnt going really fast>tard was knocked over, bleeding, crying and screaming>crowd gathers, light turns green, i cross street>go home and lulz to myself but feel a little bad about it
>saw tard again some time later>broken leg and scratched up face>glad he was ok... well, sort of ok anyway
Retard on the Bus
I got this lovely one from lolsaywhat.com:
>be on bus going to work (get a bus since its cheaper than driving)>sitting in middle of bus>group of tards get on>seats start to fill up with tards>i have the last seat>loud breathing fat tard sits next to me>breathing like he is trying to catch his breath>continues for half the trip>suddenly there is what i assumed is water flowing down the aisle>tards at very back of bus start getting rowdy>male tard lets out "MINDY PEED HUHUHUHUHUHUHU">"water" was actually tard piss>glad i wasnt at the back but mad i have to step in it to get off bus>tard next to me still breathing loud>keeps trying to touch my fucking leg>he smells like shit so one hand is holding my nose while the other stops the tards hands>finally at my stop and try to get up and leave>tard wont move (i sat next to the window)>ask him to "please move as this is my stop">still tries to touch my leg>repeat 2 more times>patience running out>ask one more time>still trying to touch my leg without saying a word>cant stand it anymore and punch the chunky fuck in the stomach and shove him out the the seat with my foot>other tards are making noise>fat tards makes strange hurr noise on the ground>i step past him and get off the bus
i used to feel sorry for tards. i would be nice and try to help them. but there's only so long i can keep my cool with their retarded ways.
>be on bus going to work (get a bus since its cheaper than driving)>sitting in middle of bus>group of tards get on>seats start to fill up with tards>i have the last seat>loud breathing fat tard sits next to me>breathing like he is trying to catch his breath>continues for half the trip>suddenly there is what i assumed is water flowing down the aisle>tards at very back of bus start getting rowdy>male tard lets out "MINDY PEED HUHUHUHUHUHUHU">"water" was actually tard piss>glad i wasnt at the back but mad i have to step in it to get off bus>tard next to me still breathing loud>keeps trying to touch my fucking leg>he smells like shit so one hand is holding my nose while the other stops the tards hands>finally at my stop and try to get up and leave>tard wont move (i sat next to the window)>ask him to "please move as this is my stop">still tries to touch my leg>repeat 2 more times>patience running out>ask one more time>still trying to touch my leg without saying a word>cant stand it anymore and punch the chunky fuck in the stomach and shove him out the the seat with my foot>other tards are making noise>fat tards makes strange hurr noise on the ground>i step past him and get off the bus
i used to feel sorry for tards. i would be nice and try to help them. but there's only so long i can keep my cool with their retarded ways.
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Helmet Tard Pete
A lovely story I got from 4 Chan.
>Elementary School.
>Had this kid we used to call 360 Pete since he would run down the hallway, jump and spin in a 360
>One day at recess Pete lost his fucking mind and decided to headbutt the school's brick wall over and over and over.
>He hit the wall so hard he took chunks of brick out of it and had blood everywhere
>Now 360 Pete wears a helmet.
>Elementary School.
>Had this kid we used to call 360 Pete since he would run down the hallway, jump and spin in a 360
>One day at recess Pete lost his fucking mind and decided to headbutt the school's brick wall over and over and over.
>He hit the wall so hard he took chunks of brick out of it and had blood everywhere
>Now 360 Pete wears a helmet.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Assorted Tard Stories
Here's some more tard stories from lolsaywhat.com.
>2nd grade>tard in gr 3, this kid was like 10/10 retarded. he wore the same pair of sweatpants everyday, weighed at least 200 lbs, as wide as he was tall, and was balding. legit. there were huge patches of his tard hair missing.>this fucker peed everywhere he could.>tard pisses in boot room>more specifically, pissed inside a kids shoe>nice hammock made of blue rope in playground at school>one day tard pisses in it>whole fucking hammock smells like piss>tard trollface when school removes it
>Gr 10>best friend has fat black retarded chick named tracy on his bus>every fucking day tracy sings along to hannah montana on her fucking late 90s walkman cd player>loud and annoying as shit>whole bus throws carrots at her one day>she cries and tard rages, bus driver installs cameras>shit gets so bad driver puts in seating plan>my friend gets tracy's former seat>when bus driver tells him this he gets super pissed>DO I LOOK FAT, BLACK, OR RETARDED?>whole bus cheers
>be in gr 12>tard on my bus>favorite tard ever>short, arabic, two lazy eyes>this kid physically cannot maintain eye contact with anyone or anything>super polite but occasionally swears like a sailor so it's really funny>will laugh has ass off if you say "shit" or "fuck", thinks tourettes guy is the funniest thing ever.>obsessed with christmas>has been singing christmas carols every day on the bus since the end of september>carries around an iphone which he shows to everyone, only two things on it are national lampoons christmas vacation and tourettes guy clips>every picture on his facebook (yes, this tard has fb) is christmas related>kid has no memory; i talk to him everyday and i'm still not sure if he knows who i am>bring guitar on the bus everyday and he always asks if its a guitar>wants to be a paramedic>calls every girl he meets beautiful, honestly means it>mfw this tard is a nobler gentleman than i
>2nd grade>tard in gr 3, this kid was like 10/10 retarded. he wore the same pair of sweatpants everyday, weighed at least 200 lbs, as wide as he was tall, and was balding. legit. there were huge patches of his tard hair missing.>this fucker peed everywhere he could.>tard pisses in boot room>more specifically, pissed inside a kids shoe>nice hammock made of blue rope in playground at school>one day tard pisses in it>whole fucking hammock smells like piss>tard trollface when school removes it
>Gr 10>best friend has fat black retarded chick named tracy on his bus>every fucking day tracy sings along to hannah montana on her fucking late 90s walkman cd player>loud and annoying as shit>whole bus throws carrots at her one day>she cries and tard rages, bus driver installs cameras>shit gets so bad driver puts in seating plan>my friend gets tracy's former seat>when bus driver tells him this he gets super pissed>DO I LOOK FAT, BLACK, OR RETARDED?>whole bus cheers
>be in gr 12>tard on my bus>favorite tard ever>short, arabic, two lazy eyes>this kid physically cannot maintain eye contact with anyone or anything>super polite but occasionally swears like a sailor so it's really funny>will laugh has ass off if you say "shit" or "fuck", thinks tourettes guy is the funniest thing ever.>obsessed with christmas>has been singing christmas carols every day on the bus since the end of september>carries around an iphone which he shows to everyone, only two things on it are national lampoons christmas vacation and tourettes guy clips>every picture on his facebook (yes, this tard has fb) is christmas related>kid has no memory; i talk to him everyday and i'm still not sure if he knows who i am>bring guitar on the bus everyday and he always asks if its a guitar>wants to be a paramedic>calls every girl he meets beautiful, honestly means it>mfw this tard is a nobler gentleman than i
Typical Autistic Online
I found this shit on lolsaywhat.com. This sums up most asspies I know.
Now, normally, I avoid calling people with Autism/Asbergers "Tards", as most of the people I know with this condition are extremely smart. And I am certainly not an advocate for bullying; I am an extremely nice person.
However, everyone has their boiling point, I have to make an exception in this rule, for a boy named "Ace."
His REAL name is Robert. However, he insists that everyone calls him Ace. Ace has EXTREME Autism or some shit. He likes zombies and anime.
The way he talks about women and girlfriends, it is SO fucking obvious he goes on 4chan.
So, armed with this knowledge and fed up with being nice to him [If you're nice to him he LATCHES ON TO YOU LIKE A FUCKING PARASITE.] I decided to exact my revenge.
>start out slowly>reference memes a lot around him>notice funny looks but he's too beta to fucking say anything>he is EXACTLY that dude on 4chan who bitches about "HURRRRR DEEEERRRRRRRP FRIENDZONE WIMMIN SUCK HEEEEEEEERP">so therefore, says nothing>gradually increase as days go by>start referencing moot in front of him>notice he's starting to get SUPER pissed>can't believe he hasn't burst out by now>continue this torture for a bit>before, finally, in the lunchroom:>"HAY GUISE GO ON 4CHAN SOMETIME LOL /b/ IS AWESOME">Tard rage in 3, 2, 1...>Ace FLIPS THE FUCK OUT>starts screaming "RULES 1 AND 2 FOR FUCKS SAKE">Ace also has this really annoying crack in his voice so this makes it x9001 as lulzy>starts screaming and carrying on>Tard wranglers grab him after he throws a milk carton at me>drag him off>entire lunchroom bursts out laughing
I'm planning to dress up like V from "V for Vendetta" on halloween to have a sequel to this tard rage.
Also, just so we're clear: No, I don't think 4chan is LOLOLSORANDUMXD, nor do I consider the retarded "RULES 1 AND 2 FAGGOT" statement to be valid. /b/ is not fucking fight club.
Now, normally, I avoid calling people with Autism/Asbergers "Tards", as most of the people I know with this condition are extremely smart. And I am certainly not an advocate for bullying; I am an extremely nice person.
However, everyone has their boiling point, I have to make an exception in this rule, for a boy named "Ace."
His REAL name is Robert. However, he insists that everyone calls him Ace. Ace has EXTREME Autism or some shit. He likes zombies and anime.
The way he talks about women and girlfriends, it is SO fucking obvious he goes on 4chan.
So, armed with this knowledge and fed up with being nice to him [If you're nice to him he LATCHES ON TO YOU LIKE A FUCKING PARASITE.] I decided to exact my revenge.
>start out slowly>reference memes a lot around him>notice funny looks but he's too beta to fucking say anything>he is EXACTLY that dude on 4chan who bitches about "HURRRRR DEEEERRRRRRRP FRIENDZONE WIMMIN SUCK HEEEEEEEERP">so therefore, says nothing>gradually increase as days go by>start referencing moot in front of him>notice he's starting to get SUPER pissed>can't believe he hasn't burst out by now>continue this torture for a bit>before, finally, in the lunchroom:>"HAY GUISE GO ON 4CHAN SOMETIME LOL /b/ IS AWESOME">Tard rage in 3, 2, 1...>Ace FLIPS THE FUCK OUT>starts screaming "RULES 1 AND 2 FOR FUCKS SAKE">Ace also has this really annoying crack in his voice so this makes it x9001 as lulzy>starts screaming and carrying on>Tard wranglers grab him after he throws a milk carton at me>drag him off>entire lunchroom bursts out laughing
I'm planning to dress up like V from "V for Vendetta" on halloween to have a sequel to this tard rage.
Also, just so we're clear: No, I don't think 4chan is LOLOLSORANDUMXD, nor do I consider the retarded "RULES 1 AND 2 FAGGOT" statement to be valid. /b/ is not fucking fight club.
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