i found the lack of tard stories on here disturbing, so here's what happened a few weeks ago when i was going home from work.
>just finished work, late in afternoon>have to cross a few streets to get to parking garage>stuck at crossing with large group of people>theres a mother and her young tard son>hes barking and thinks he's a dog>he's roofing at me and trys leg humping a stranger>she shouts at him and tries to control him>he calms abit, everyone is looking at him, hes now growling>get epic idea>get newspaper out of briefcase>throw into on coming traffic and shout FETCH!>tard barks and runs into traffic>mother screams >tards gets hit by car>car was slowing down to turn, so it wasnt going really fast>tard was knocked over, bleeding, crying and screaming>crowd gathers, light turns green, i cross street>go home and lulz to myself but feel a little bad about it
>saw tard again some time later>broken leg and scratched up face>glad he was ok... well, sort of ok anyway
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